Inspirational Quote

Written by: Rachel Marie Camilleri Gibson

22nd august 2019…16:10pm, 1 year ago today, I received a phone call…a phone call that in the back of my mind I knew one day I might get …

All my close friends knew I would watch the news and whenever there was a motorbike accident I would start worrying until I heard the age of the biker and I would say oh thank god it’s not my dad… until 1 year ago today …. the words I heard: “your dad had a motorbike accident and it’s best you come to the hospital”.

I was there in minutes but even though I always knew this might happen, nothing could have prepared me for the minute I stepped in the emergency room…. I got stopped and was told to prepare for the worst and that it was very serious.

I saw your lifeless body on the resus table with doctors working on you… you looked like you were sleeping…My body froze and everything was in slow motion as the tears flew and it was hard to breathe. I was numb. You suffered a head injury; you had your last rights…. and you were in a coma…

All I could do was sit and talk to you and hold your hand… ITU had stricken visiting hours so we were only allowed there a short time. When I was at home my mind was with you and all I found myself doing was walking the corridor back and forth… staying on hospital grounds was one of my comforts… in the hope I would be allowed in ITU earlier to spent a little extra time next to you. I never missed a visit. Sleepless nights were the worst… they were so long. Why did this happen? I was looking for a “fix it” but there just wasn’t one…it was out of my control…

One day we were stopped by the doctor and he said: “You know your father isn’t waking up and he told us its best to see for ourselves” so you were taken off sedation in front of our eyes… and it was true you were not waking up no matter how hard we called you to wake up… and it was horrible to watch… the support we had from all your friends, work colleagues, students and family was unbelievable and very emotional… and that didn’t make me feel as alone as I felt without you, it made me feel how much people respected you and how everyone was praying for you to pull through….

And at last 12 long days later…You woke up (just in time for your 1st born grandson’s birthday) we couldn’t have asked for more…. and I finally got a little sleep…. you were confused…. one night you asked me where my mum was and I had to tell you she died 15years ago….you were shocked but I stayed strong at that minute although after I went to work crying that night, like I cried most nights (my work colleagues have seen me at my worst and cried with me) … you had to learn to stand, walk, talk, eat, swallow etc…

Everything from scratch, but every day you did something new and that something new made me brag to everyone I knew, I found myself saying to people “can you believe dad did this today?”… the little things you did made a big accomplishment in my mind and I was and am so proud of you… you were allowed home and I got to spend everyday with you…. how blessed I was…. I thanked god everyday… and still do…

It wasn’t your time to go as God and Mum knew I wouldn’t have managed to survive without you… the trauma and emotional process I went through has been a long journey too just like yours and I want people to know that family of people involved in accidents struggle too… hopefully my story will touch someone out there and help them see light at the end of a dark tunnel.

Now you want to ride your bike again… that shocked me again. Will this happen again? Will I have to go through this again? But I will find the strength somewhere whatever happens in the future. And as they say once a biker always a biker and I can never take that away from you no matter how scared I am. But then again once a worrier always a worrier for me and I will always worry about you, but I just hope and pray that I never have to go through this again …
Look out for bikers out there…. someone’s whole world is on that bike and my whole world survived that day and I am forever grateful.