Inspiration for today

by | Jul 19, 2024 | Resources

 “One day you will tell your story of how

you have overcome what you are going through now,

and it will become part of someone else’s survival guide”

Ehraz Ahmend

In memory of my dearest Boris

In memory of my dearest Boris

by | Jun 24, 2020 | Resources

In memory of my dearest Boris

On that fateful day, two years ago, my world was ripped from under my feet. In splits of seconds, I lost you, I lost the life I knew, and the hopes and dreams that used to push me forward. The accident came without a warning. It crushed my body, heart, and soul…the price I paid for surviving…without you. There is only the sudden horror, the wrench of being torn apart; empty pit…and a reminder that nothing is permanent. In splits of seconds, the bliss is replaced with:

  • the shock,
  • the trauma.
  • the denial,
  • the fear of unknown,
  • the bargaining,
  • the unanswered prayers,
  • the broken body,
  • the broken heart,
  • the sleepless nights,
  • the physical pain,
  • the existential crisis…

when my breath is crushed under the weight of silence and all that it means.

Somehow, I am surviving all that and begin to break through this dark heavy cocoon…spreading my wings steadily, moving toward the light. Hope and new dreams start filling my soul again.

And that is how I survive.

That is how you would want it to be my dearest Boris️…

In your honor I will continue to persevere and give myself a chance at life…a new life with even more grit and grace. I know you would have loved that. At the same time, I will always be remembering

  • the laughter,
  • the irrepressible spirit,
  • the generous heart…

the only memories of you that really matter ❤️

I will still cry.

But this time with loving reflection more than hopeless longing.

You are and will always be loved.

Rest in peace my darling. ️💛❤️💛❤️ 💛

Why do I do what I do?

Why do I do what I do?

by | May 10, 2019 | Resources

Confession of Accident Survivor

What I want is to ease the experience of recovery and to increase survivors’ self-efficacy through support group, story telling and resource sharing, all of  which has a potential of strengthening coping, as well as reducing isolation and hopelessness.

My name is Kasia Lyczkowska and I am a motorbike accident survivor. Sunday the 24th of June 2018 changed my life forever. Me and my love, Boris were coming back from shopping at Bay Street going in direction on St. Venera. We entered the Kappara junction tunnel just to skid on something wet (on the dry day) and loose control half way through, hitting the wall on our right side. Seconds later I was thrown on the left side of the road while Boris still tried to regain control ending 50 meters away from me.

The aftermath was tragic. After two days in induced coma I was waken up to the worst news. My Boris didn’t make it due to severe head injuries. I wanted to die…the survivor guilt was taking over, just like my physical injuries. Broken hips, ribs, pelvis, right leg was beyond hope initially, and I learn later that they wanted to amputate it. Fractured femur, tibia, fibula and smashed knee. I underwent two surgeries, first one on day of accident was to align the leg and bones in straight line with external fixators, and second one, 10 days later to reconstruct my knee and apply metal rods and screws throughout my leg and heaps. I also got many blood transfusions due to massive blood loss.

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The recovery was long and difficult. There were many days filled with frustration and anger that things won’t be the same. That I won’t be the same. That’s I might no function the same. Questions like: would I ever walk, drive, dance, cycle or ski couldn’t get our of my head. I was one active lady once, and within seconds of that very Sunday afternoon, I was confined to bed, where I even could’t go to the toilet on my own for the first months. Thankfully, there were also brighter days with baby-steps progress. I eventually managed to let go and acceptance my situation embracing patience and time as my best teachers in my recovery journey.

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I suffered physical, emotional and existential pain. I faced loss of the best man in my life, I lost my mobility and meaning in life. If it wasn’t for my family and friends and their heartfelt support I wouldn’t make it. But I did make it. Something wanted me to stay here. So, I am alive, far from perfect, but grateful – and if there is something I want most in my life now, it is to give back. I want to serve accident survivors and give any support possible as a fellow survivor, be it on individual or group level. I can offer a listening ear, a smile, hand-holding, tears-sharing, hope and sense that you are not alone.

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I also want to create a community of helpers, and partner with a kind-hearten people who wish to help the accident survivors to raise physically, emotionally and mentally again.

If you think you are the right person with motivation and ability to help, please contact me through Get Involved page.

Much love,

Kasia

 

Peer Support Groups, what’s in it for accident survivors?

Peer Support Groups, what’s in it for accident survivors?

by | May 9, 2019 | Resources

After spending over 2 months in Mater Dei hospital and asking for psychologist who could help me in dealing with my grief and PTSD, I started to loose my hope. I learnt I am on waiting list, and that psychologist might be assigned within 6 months. I needed psychological help immediately, God knows where I am going to be in 6 months.

When my friend, Anne asked what I needed, after witnessing my outburst of frustration,

I answered without hesitation: I need to speak with someone who went through a similar ordeal but is standing tall now. I needed hope injection urgently! I needed to learn from someone that it is possible to survive such pain and suffering and come on the other side. The next day, a lovely gentlemen called Noel came on his wheelchair to my hospital room. He was Anne’s friend who lost his leg due to thromboses. He told me his story, answered my questions and shared his tips regarding recovery.

The words and acts of kindness are more healing to a drooping heart than balm or honey. Sarah Fielding

The traumatic injuries resulted after an accident not only affected my physical functioning but also the psycho-social health. I was in grieving process after losing Boris, and getting depressed not knowing what’s ahead of me. I was in physical pain, disabled to walk, and I was having panic attacks and post-traumatic stress leaving me breathless.

Noel’s voluntary gesture of coming to see me changed my perspective. He helped me realise that I am not the only one, and there is many other people who went through a tragic circumstances and managed. Noel in fact. managed really well. According to him, his life became much more active and meaningful after the amputation. He part-takes in marathons and travels the world, there is nothing to stop him. What an inspiration! His gesture and impact it had on my recovery, inspired my new mission which is:

To connect with, and empower accident survivors by providing peer support groups facilitating their recovery.

So, what’s in it for you? These are some benefits of joining a peer support group:

  • Gaining support and hope from others facing similar experiences

  • Feeling less anxious, afraid or alone

  • Sharing experiences and helping others by doing so

  • Learning new skills for coping and enhancing your life

  • Becoming more self-confident

  • Feeling more in control

  • Developing new friendships

Recovery is never a straight process, it’s usually a long bridge covered in fog of confusion and not knowing what’s next. Why not crossing this bridge together with those who already crossed it before you?

Much love,

Kasia

Please join the Survivors Group on Facebook